• Brettney Douglas-Al Hindi

How Jada Got Her Groove Back, And Why That's None of Our Business

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Now, I'm not one to meddle in celebrity gossip, but Angela Yee's one-on-one interview with August Alsina about his alleged affair with Jada Pinkett-Smith was the perfect distraction from all the heaviness of the recent weeks.

Yee's exclusive interview went viral after Alsina confirmed being linked romantically to Pinkett-Smith, and boy did he serve some piping hot tea, or what he likes to call "speaking his truth." August alleges that his character was put into question and that he wanted to address it once and for all; after losing money, friendships, and other relationships. He even disclosed that he had a sit-down conversation with Will Smith, and he"gave him his blessing." He went on to describe how deeply he loved Jada, how devoted he was to her, and that leaving the relationship was one of the hardest things he had to do. August added, “I can die right now and be okay knowing that I fully gave myself to somebody … Some people never get that in this lifetime.”

Aunty Jada, what did you do to the poor man? She put that good good on him, and now he doesn't know how to act.

This is another level of adulting that some can't handle, only for the grown and sexy. It takes some real sexual maturity to be able to engage in sexual activity with someone who is already spoken for, and not catch feelings.

Alexa, play I'm Sprung by T-Pain

I'm not gonna lie, I kind of chuckled at how emotional he was about the whole ordeal, but there is a part of me that genuinely felt bad for August because he really fell hard for Jada.

I think with August being so young and naive, he got himself in a situation that he wasn't ready for, and perhaps had some unrealistic expectations of what the aftermath of their affair would look like. I think in order for an arrangement as such to work, there have to be clear boundaries between all parties involved so that everyone is on the same page. I think in August's case, he didn't have the proper tools and support to cope after he and Jada broke up and that was evident in the interview. The singer insists that walking away from his affair with the actress when she "butchered" him basically "killed" him.

August got hurt hurt.

...Keep your heart 3 stacks, keep your heart

Aye, keep your heart 3 stacks, keep your heart

Man, these girls is smart, 3 stacks, these girls is smart

Play your part

Play your part

Since when is it okay to kiss and tell?

Did he really think that she was gonna leave her husband?

Is this a publicity stunt because his new album is coming out?

What makes this story even more interesting is that reps for Jada Pinkett Smith have issued a statement, calling the claims “absolutely not true.”

Who's telling the truth, and who is lying?

I have so many questions...

I've read probably over 100 comments on IG from internet trolls about their displeasure of Jada stepping outside of her marriage to engage in sexcapades with a younger man, and how she should be ashamed of herself. Some took it as far as saying that she was embarrassing her children and essentially ruining not only her reputation, but Will's also. One comment, in particular, stood out: "yall making jokes about Will and Jada even though yall in open relationships right now and don't even know it."

There are so many people who cheat and lie to their significant others and justify their actions by saying that their needs were not being met, instead of being honest with themselves and their partner about their unhappiness.

Contrary to popular belief, I do not subscribe to this notion that we are intended to be with just one person, but...it's within the confines of what you and your partner decide is best for your partnership/marriage.

I commend couples like Will and Jada for their transparency and for approaching their love in a way that is nonconforming, altruistic, and authentic to them individually, and collectively.

On any account, Jada doesn't owe anyone an explanation for what she does in the privacy of her bedroom. She is a grown woman with a healthy, sexual appetite and has the full support of her husband to freely explore her life and her body on her own terms.

Marriage is an agreement between two people, well three, if you're religious, but that's beside the point...however, Jada got her groove back, and that's none of our business.

Rumors about the Smith's possible open marriage have been circulating for years now, so Alsina's emotional recount of the nature of his relationship with Jada was not far fetched.

On several occasions, Will and Jada have said that they no longer refer to one another as husband or wife, or say that they are "married," and instead use the term "life partners," which eludes to the fact that they have a nontraditional marital agreement. Jada has also said, "I've always told Will, you can do whatever you want as long as you can look at yourself in the mirror and be okay." She goes on to say, "...because, at the end of the day, Will is his own man. I'm here as his partner, but he is his own man. He has to decide who he wants to be and that's not for me to do for him. Or vice versa."

Take it from the late, great Nipsey Hussle who said it best: “...you can’t possess people, you can only experience them.”

A lot of times people view marriage from a place of ego and possessiveness, without factoring in the other person's fulfillment, and happiness. As you grow in love and do life together; the reality is, that your needs change. What worked in the beginning, may not work now; and so I think we as a society have to face the realities of that. Many people assume that the woman in the relationship should suffer and abandon her sexual desires while normalizing this notion that "men will be men." Why can't we keep that same energy with women like Jada who are taking control of their feminity and sexuality, and who have the courage to have an honest dialogue about it? If she and her husband are on one accord, how dare we judge their actions?

Some may argue, what's the point of an open marriage? If you're not happy, then why stay married? It's not that simple. I get it, some of us cannot shake the idea of sharing our mate with another person, because it could cause unnecessary heartbreak, drama, and/or other unforeseen circumstances.

At the end of the day, as long as there is trust, respect, and open communication between you and your significant other, no one else's opinion matters.

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